A Leap of Judgement Could Be Costly

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2002 Boaz Rauchwerger

On the road to success, there are some obstacles. Unfortunately, many of them are ones we construct ourselves.

A man once called our office from another state and asked to speak with me. When I started listening to him, he sounded drunk. Instinctively, I thought he was most inconsiderate to call a business office when he'd had too much to drink. He slurred his words and spoke in a slow, uneven pace.

Since I teach patience in my seminars, I listened as the man expressed his desire. After a few minutes, the conversation was over.

About a month later, I was conducting a seminar in the city where this man lived. At the end of the event, an older gentleman walked slowly up to me. "You probably don't remember me," he said. His words were slurred and he spoke in a slow, uneven pace.

"I have an incurable disease which makes it hard for me to talk," he continued. "When I called you a few weeks ago, you didn't make fun of me. Some people think I'm drunk when I talk. But you were kind and patient. You made my day."

I almost came to tears as he spoke. I thought about the fact that I had leaped to judgement when he called and so grateful that I didn't. How many times have we all done that? How many times have we been wrong about people when we judged too quickly? How many opportunities have we missed?

The story is told about a father with four young children riding on a city bus. His kids were out of control. They were jumping, talking loudly, creating a scene. A prim and proper lady, sitting a few rows behind them, was getting quite agitated. How dare the father allow his children to act like that? Surely, he could control them.

When the lady came to her stop and got off the bus, the father and his children did the same. As the lady stepped up to the father to reprimand him for his children's actions, he greeted her with an apology. "I'm sorry," he said, "for the way my children were acting on the bus. We've come from the hospital. They're mother just died."

Next time you're tempted to judge someone too quickly, why not put yourself in their shoes. Perhaps, if you had experienced what they had, you would act the same way.

Let's show patience and tolerance. The rewards can be great. If you find yourself to be a nervous person, the following affirmation could help: I'm a calm and peaceful person. In a moment when you may find yourself impatient with others, close your eyes and say that affirmation several times slowly while taking deep breaths. It will change your entire demeanor.

Things Are Not Always What They Seem

Someone sent me a story recently, author unknown, which continues this theme.

Two angels were traveling in the countryside. They stopped one night at the home of a wealthy farmer. However, he was greedy and unkind. They asked for a place to sleep and he offered them the basement. In the basement, the older Angel noticed a hole in the wall and fixed it.

The next night they came to the home of a poor farmer and asked for lodging. That farmer was very giving and offered the main bedroom of the home. In the morning, the Angels awakened to find the farmer and his wife weeping. Their milk cow, their only source of income, had died.

The younger Angel questioned the older one. "Why, when we stayed in the home of the rich farmer, did you fix the hole in the wall? Then, last night, when we stayed with the poor farmer, you allowed is only cow to die?"

The older Angel said, "Things are not always what they seem. In the basement of the rich, but greedy farmer, I saw gold in the wall. I covered it up so he wouldn't get it. Last night, when we stayed with the poor farmer, the Angel of Death came for his wife. I gave him their cow. Things are not always what they seem."

Once again, patience, tolerance and understanding are traits we could all improve.

A Daily Judgement Affirmation

I am a calm and peaceful person. I shall not leap to judgements.